In my previous post I discussed the value and importance of becoming a life speaker. Although it is extremely important to living the life we desire it is easier said than done.
You might ask, “How do I learn to speak life?” The answer requires us to tame our tongue. And how do we learn to tame our tongues? It starts by changing our hearts.
The words we speak are just an extension of the thoughts we think. If we want to become a life speaker we must guard our hearts and exercise great discernment with what we allow to enter our hearts and minds.
We are a reflection of the people we associate with and the media sources we allow to enter our minds. So many of us walk through life falsely believing that we can hang out with friends who say and do things we do not agree with so long as we don’t say or do those things. We also live in a culture where we are constantly bombarded by negative messages through TV, music, movies, internet, and advertising. Unless we make a conscious decision to protect our hearts and minds from these influences we will begin to adopt their messages in our thoughts, words, and actions.
To become a life speaker it is really a two part process.
Step 1 – Remove current negative influences (people and media) from our lives
Step 2 – Add in positive influences (people and media) from our lives
My wife and I have built a business that required us to grow personally in a lot of areas. We were instantly thrown into a championship culture where we were surrounded by a lot of positive people who had found success in the areas of life we desired. While it was extremely valuable to be surrounded by such positive, encouraging, and wise people we were not seeing the growth we desired immediately.
I believe there are so many men and women out there who desire to live a life of greater significance. They being to read and listen to positive things and they even try to meet positive people in new environments. This is important, but we cannot simply add positive influences into our lives without also removing existing negative influences.
The illustration that helped make it crystal clear for me was to think of our lives as a glass full of dirt. If we begin to pour clean water into the glass we will have a glass full of dirty water. If we want to have a clean glass of water we must first clean out all of the dirt before we begin to pour that fresh water in.
Once I understood this it gave me great clarity and focus. It required me to make some extremely hard decisions. I had to remove a lot of friendships from college and high school. It was not necessarily because they were bad people, but because they were not in alignment with where I wanted my future family to be. I also had to make drastic changes to the media influences I let into my mind. In each instance I simply asked myself, “Will this get me closer to or further from where I want to be in life?”
Here are a few examples of actions I took that have made significant improvements in the five major areas of my life; Faith, Family, Friends, Finances, & Fitness.
I stopped drinking alcohol
I stopped hanging out with anyone if they were drinking alcohol around me
I stopped watching the news
I stopped listening to rap music and heavy metal
I stopped watching movies with excessive foul language and graphic violence
I cancelled cable TV
I stopped reading “Men’s” magazines that objectified women
Those are just a few of the specific actions I took that helped me see incredible growth in all areas of my life. I am sure you could come up with a way better list than I did. What I can tell you as I have continued to clean the “dirt” out of my glass and fill it with more fresh water (positive relationships and media sources) my life has continued to improve. The thoughts I think and the words I speak are completely different and I believe most people would now consider me to be a man who speaks life into others.
What does your ideal life look like? Are the people you spend time with and the media influences you allow into your mind moving you closer to or further from that ideal life?
Question: What is one media source you currently allow into your life that is preventing you from living the life you desire and being a life speaker? What can you do about that in order to move closer to the life you want to live?
Your transparency and candor is refreshing. The more I see and learn about you, the more I look up to you, even in spite of our age difference.
Rob, Thank you brother. I am blessed to know you. I will continue to offer as much insight and wisdom as I can through this blog.